Who would I be if I hadn't met you?

Lately, I find that being away from home makes me reflect so much more about who I am and how I got here. After more than 2 weeks, I still have moments where I have to stop, look around, and tell myself that I am in New Zealand, half way across the world from home. It makes me wonder how I ever got here.

I suppose I could go back to the days of my childhood and piece together all of the moments, decisions, and other things that got me to where I am today, but right now, I want to think more about the people who made me the person I am today; this person who would be brave enough to move and teach in a country so far away from home, friends, family, comfort, and familiarity.

As I've gotten older, I have always tried to see reasons for why certain people are put in my life. Some, I'm sure I have let pass by without a second thought, while others seem to linger on in my mind. Family, of course, has made me more of who I am than anything else. Friends, have given me feelings of love, laughter, joy, sadness, and have donated a million different experiences into my life. But there are three people in particular that I htink have greatly contributed to the deep self-reflection of who I am today.

One has made me more perceptive, able to see the things in myself that I do not like in others. Has made me realize what it is I do and do not want for myself. I have realized that I was taught more about loving everyone around me, not to judge others by anything other than who they are. I was taught to not be so caught up in the moment, not to take my anger and frustration out on something other than what caused it. This person taught me to communicate, to see the other's side of the story, to want true happiness for someone despite what you want from them.

Another has made me look at how I want to be different and how I choose to be viewed by other people. I learned that above all, it is important to get to know a person and that even when you think you know someone, you may not truly know them at all. I learned how to be so content with my life that nothing could destroy it, how to live and cherish little moments, how to be more for myself than I wanted to be before. I learned to be selfless and cooperative, how to make compromises and sacrifices. I learned to be more for someone else than always for myself. I learned to expect someone to put in exaclty or more of what I am putting in.

From the last, I learned about not being scared to say what you are thinking. I learned to talk about things instead of holding it in and pretending it will go away. I learned to be more carefree and I learned that I deserve exactly what it is that I want and nothing less. I learned how to sit around a campfire and sing. I learned how to talk about death, that it is not an awkward thing to discuss, but a beautiful life to remember. I learned to love different music, and to let that music take me into a world full of seemingly meaningless memories.

I learned to make little memories into big ones that help me to look back and see how I wouldn't be me if I hadn't met you.